My thoughts about smoking

Here I am, a week after deciding to quit smoking, still smoking.  Tried to quit cold turkey and it woke up my "vampire".  So I decided to try just smoking a few ciggies a day.  So far the most I have smoked is 4 in a day.  Which is really good as I use to smoke a pack a day.  But I really, really, really want to quit.  Everyone has good advice--join this online support group, use this, do that---and I really appreciate the advice and the support.  I really do.  But nothing seems to be working and it's really beginning to irritate me.

I try to stay busy so that it isn't on my mind ALL the time but I can't stay busy every minute of every day.  As soon as I sit still, it pops in my head--"I want a ciggie". As an addict-I understand that there are deeper reasons behind my actions.  But for the life of me, I can't seem to get a handle on this--why I just can't seem to give up the smokes.

Maybe it's because I haven't really dealt with the reasons I became an addict.  I don't know.

Maybe tho', by writing here, it will help.  That I'll get to the reasons and be able to quit.

I don't know.  All I know is I am sooo sick and tired of smoking.